It was Sunday, about 1 pm, and I needed out! I tried taking a nap, but I just couldn't fall asleep, I had to do something or else I was going to go crazy. Without much thought I threw on my running shoes and took off. Sometimes when running under emotion I don't really think very straight...About a mile into running I realized I had not eaten since the night before, I was super thirsty, and I hadn't put any sunscreen on. Oh well, I'll be fine. By the time I got to 1.5 miles at the intersection, I knew exactly where I was going, there was a big loop I had been wanting to run, but I hadn't tried it yet. I didn't really know how far it was, but surely it would be far enough to wear me out. The run had some intense hills in it and by the time I got to about mile 5 I was more worn out than I had been in a long time, pretty sure I was getting burned, dieing of thirst, and determined to finish the whole loop running. This got me to thinking about my life = running metaphor....
Sometimes in life I am running hills so steep it seems I can hardly lift my feet. It is tempting to stop and walk when I am going almost the same pace as walking. I look up and think I see the top of the hill, only to be fooled, for when I get there it is only a slight dip before an even steeper incline. It is tempting to stop and walk when I don't see the top. I wonder how much longer till I reach the downhill? I wonder if I can make it to the top? I wonder if I should just stop and walk? Yet, something I know is that walking in a run is always proceeded by a choice to do so. Never has my body just automatically quit running (except when I got an involuntary calf cramp once in track...). It has ALWAYS been proceeded by a choice in my mind. Walking is a choice. Running is a choice. Sometimes when I'm running steep hills in life I just want to walk, to give in to my pain and give up. It may be isolating myself, stuffing emotions away, taking emotions out on those around me, blaming God, blaming others, asking why, being angry, throwing a pity party....you name it. But, choosing to run those steep hills in life, is choosing to trust God and draw on His strength to get to the top. It is choosing to believe the hill will make you stronger and God has a purpose for you running it. Choosing to run is hard, sometimes I have to make that choice every mile and sometimes I have to make that choice every step.
Well, Sunday I chose to run. I ran the whole 7.5 or 8 miles on the loop in the 80 degree sunshine. When I got to the end my knees hurt, I was burnt, I had blisters on my feet, I had the worst cotton mouth, and my calves were threatening to cramp. It was probably not so smart to go running in the middle of the day without having eaten since the day before....but I needed out.
Add: 13.5 miles running
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